I am at a loss for a good topic. I was watching a show called 'Royal Pains' on the USA Network. One of the characters, who is Indian, said to another woman that she and her betrothed would not have sex until they were married. Another character said that it was important to test things out before they were married.
I found this kind of odd. I think there are lots of reasons to have sex with someone but just to test it out is not one of them. I have said to friends and acquaintances alike that I think people who are thinking about entering in a emotional and physical relationship should discuss sex but they do not need to have sex. When I say this, I get varied reactions. One thing that is more consistent than I thought is that many women say that they would not date a guy who is a virgin. Another thing is that a number of the people I have spoken with say that they would never marry someone without having sex with them first. I know I have been married a while and together with the same woman for a while longer, but if I were with someone who was saving themselves for marriage, I doubt I would end the relationship, even at my age. Just because you have had sex, even many times, does not mean you are good at it or if you have not that you are not good at it. Sex with the right person(s) can be good in very different ways at different times. Good sex at 25 may be very different than good sex at 45. Your needs change, your wants change, and your comfort changes. At 25, you might want to hang from the rafters, after living and going through some stuff you might want to forgo the acrobatics and opt for the passion of closeness and comfort.
Here is something to consider, I have rarely heard someone who is currently married say that having sex with your betrothed before marriage is very important. More often than not, those people say it is important to be content with yourself.
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